August 2, 2017:      In Memory of Marie

Not much I can say here.  Our hearts go out to my bandmate and friend Rob Signorile and his family for the sudden loss of his wife Marie.   Marie was vibrant, dynamic, and a sweet ball of energy.    One of the best things about playing with Rob was getting to hang out with Marie – exchanging recipes and gossip about the kids (or grandkids).   We will miss her dearly. 

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As you can see below, Better off Dead has a mini North Jersey summer tour going on here.   I have one detour on Friday the 11th.  

Aug 4, Friday, 9:00PM-1:00AM – Better Off Dead – at Core’s Tavern, 45 Franklin St, Bloomfield, NJ  (973) 429-1708
 http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/http://www.corestavern.com/

Aug 5, Saturday, 7:00PM-9:00ish – Better Off Dead – at Ruthie’s BBQ, 64 1/2 Chestnut Ave, Montclair  (973) 509-1134
http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htmhttp://www.ruthiesbbq.com/

Aug 11, Friday, 8:00PM-11:00 – JT Bowen & The Mighty Kings of Soul – at Crossroads,  78 North Ave, Garwood, NJ 07027, USA  (908) 232-5666
This is a very special gig for me.  JT & I played together in several different bands back in the late 70s and early 80s.  JT went on to record and perform with Clarence Clemmons (of Springsteen fame).  Our lives took different paths and we lost touch.  Now, 35 years later, we have reconnected and this will be the first time since (I think) 1981 that we will be performing together.  I’m not sure what time we will hit the stage as there are two opening acts.  You can check out JT on YouTube and you can purchase his new album on iTunes or his web site.
http://www.jtbowen.com/
http://www.xxroads.com/

Aug 12, Saturday, 9:00PM-1:00AM – Better Off Dead – at The Great Notch Inn, Route 46, Little Falls  (973) 256-7742
http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/
http://www.agreatertown.com/little_falls_nj/great_notch_inn_new_jerseys_rockin_roadhouse_00089580

June 16, 2017:      Please say that again.

I’ve always had some difficulty making out what people say – especially when they talk fast or if there’s a lot of background noise going on.   Some examples:

–  At a loud party with a lot of people talking I find it difficult to make out conversations – I sometimes turn away my head to get my ear closer to the person I’m trying to listen to.
–  Last month, I was trying to confirm a hotel reservation I had made.  The hotel person confirmed my reservation, and then the conversation continued roughly like this:

Hotel person:  “IseranythiesIcnhpuwi”.
Me:  “I’m sorry, could you say that again please?”
Hotel person:  “IseranythiesIcnhpuwi?”
Me:  “I’m sorry, could you say that more slowly please?”
Hotel person:  “Is there anything else I can help you with?”
Me:  “Oh, no thank you”

–  I’m terrible at playing the Telephone Party Game – where a phrase is whispered from person to person to see how it gets garbled.  I can’t make out the whispering.    In the TV detective shows – when the defendants attorney is whispering advice into the suspect’s ear about how to respond to a question?   I would make a terrible suspect since I’d have no idea what was being whispered in my ear.

–  One more example,  The other day my wife Lisa picked me up at the train station after work.  On the way home we had the following conversation in the car
Lisa:  “All the people at the post office say hi”.      {A least that’s what it sounded like at first.  I mulled this over in my mind for a minute and tried to make sense of it.  “All the people at the post office?”   Huh? }  
Me:  “What was that?”
Lisa: “All the people at Dr. Post’s office say hi”.   

Dr. Post is our family dentist that we both go to.  Lisa had gone for a check up earlier in the day.

While you’re recovering from that exchange,  let me whisper in your ear where I’m playing tomorrow night:

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June 17th, Saturday, 7:00PM-8:30ish – Shuffle, Jump, and Moan at Hat City, 459 Valley Street,  City of Orange, NJ 07050 (862) 252-9147
Note the early start time here – this is ideal if you’re coming for the great food here.  I believe there’s a cover charge of $10 – but you can call ahead to double check. 
http://www.hatcitykitchen.com https://www.facebook.com/pages/Shuffle-Jump-Moan/379081422265206?fref=ts

May 15, 2017:      Old Dog?  Meet New Trick.

We went out to LA last month for a wedding and to catch up with relatives and old friends.    We rented a car ahead of time at  #@$%&@* Car Rental.   I will conceal the name to protect the innocents but it is often associated with someone named Rara.   Anyway, because we are getter older I choose to rent a Prius, because that’s what we’re used to driving – and it has built in GPS.  I deliberately choose the GPS option (pay attention, that’s the crucial part here).  
 
After landing, when we got to #@$%&@* Car Rental it was a madhouse.  I thought that since I had paid for a specific car ahead of time that it would be waiting there for me, apparently that only applies to Preferred Customers (or whatever the hell they call them).      I won’t make that mistake again.    We got in a line that was out the door.  Then our guardian angel appeared – in the guise of a {cough} employee.
She took us to the returns building (since check in was so crowded they were taking the overflow in the other building)  .

At the returns building, our guardian angel punched in our reservation but then with tears in her eyes she confessed, “Sorry, we have no Priuses available right now.  I can give you a mid-sized car at a slightly lower price – and since the Prius has much better gas mileage we will not charge you for gas”    We were devastated for a brief couple of milli-seconds, but soon recovered. We would get on with our lives. 
“OK – but does it have built in GPS?”  
“Sorry, but we only supply the hand-held GPS systems.”
“OK”“It’s a ‘ Holy GPS Device’ model 42, sir.   That’s an excellent model, easy to use”
“OK”

Now we proceeded to wait a bit.   Then we waited a bit more.   The ‘Holy GPS Devices’ were locked up in a secret cave.    A dragon was slain.   The ‘Holy GPS Device’ was brought unto us and placed in our hands with the usual blessings.   And then, and then?    Our trek was not yet done because they could not enter the ID number of ‘The Holy GPS Device’ into the computer.

So while they were working on that, Lisa & I said to each other “That’s strange.  How come no one rents GPS any more?   Hmm.   You know it might have to do with one of those apps that people have on their cell phones.  Haven’t we seen our kids using those?   Maybe we could use those and then not have to wait.”
 
So we both took out our cells and by the time our guardian angel gave up on entering the GPS ID into the computer and just wrote out our receipt?   We had figured out how to use Google Maps – I had gotten the directions to our hotel mapped out.

Later during our stay . . . . just out of curiosity. . .  we tried running both Google Maps and ‘The Holy GPS Device’ at the same time.   Google Maps won by about two lengths- it was quicker and the instructions were a bit more understandable.

Oh yeah.   The wedding was wonderful and we had some bittersweet “catching up” get-togethers.   Fucking traffic out there makes me crazy.

Oh, and wait – there’s more!!   When we returned the car?   After we walked 1/2 mile to get back to our hotel I realized that I had left the car key in my pocket!    Why did they let me leave without double checking that the key was in the car?!   Can’t they see we’re getting older?!    As our hotel was only 1/2 mile or so away from the hotel, I figured someone could run right over and pick up the key – but no-o-o-o.   You cannot get through to a human being at the LA {cough} Car Rental. 
 
It’s now about 10:00 at night and we’re leaving for the airpot at 6:45 the next morning.  So I got a cab to drive me back to the  {aargh} Returns Building – and they knew immediately which car it was.  They even arranged to have me driven back to the hotel.   So I get into van that’s driving me back.

“Where ya going?”
“Marriott Hotel”
I am driven to a ‘Marriott’ – but it is not my hotel.   Where the hell are we, I wasn’t paying more attention where we going?
“This is not my hotel!”“But it’s the Marriott”
“That’s not my hotel”
“Oh, you must be at the ‘blah-blah Marriott’.  That’s just down the road closer to the airport.”
We drive – now I know where we are and where my hotel is.   But the driver turns off the road before we get to my hotel.
“This isn’t it”
“This is the ‘blah-blah Marriott’   Oh!  You must be at the Courtyard Marriott”
Third time was a charm.   Who knew that Marriott Hotels come in three different flavor?   Now I know – and so do you.   I gave the driver a very nice tip and thanked him for being patient with me.

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May 6, Saturday, 9:00PM-1:00AM – Better Off Dead at The Great Notch Inn, Route 46, Little Falls  (973) 256-7742
Sing along to the melody of Back in the Saddle- “Back at the No-otch again.   We’re back at the No-otch again.  It’s been so long that I can’t remember when.    We’re back at the No-otch again”
http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/
http://www.agreatertown.com/little_falls_nj/great_notch_inn_new_jerseys_rockin_roadhouse_00089580

May 12, Friday, 7:00-9:00 PM – With Jake Walker,  at Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza, 64 1/2 Chestnut Ave, Montclair  (973) 509-1134Jake Walker is world class guitarist, vocalist, and song writer.  He regularly tours in Europe and has a well reviewed CD to his name.  I will be playing mostly blues with him at Ruthie’s, along with bassist Brian Hess.
http://www.ruthiesbbq.com/http://www.jakewalkerband.com/

May 20, Saturday, 9:00PM-1:00AM – Better Off Dead at Core’s Tavern, 45 Franklin St, Bloomfield, NJ  (973) 429-1708 Core’s Tavern is new to me – but if you look out on their website you’ll see that this place has quite the back story – multil-generational neighborhood gathering place.  Better off Dead also has quite the back story too – but this is a family e-mail so the details will have to go unsaid.
http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/http://www.corestavern.com/

March 29, 2017:      The Laws of God, The Laws of Man

From Last Poems  by A.E.Houseman

XII
The laws of God, the laws of man,
He may keep that will and can;
Not I: let God and man decree
Laws for themselves and not for me;
And if my ways are not as theirs
Let them mind their own affairs.
Their deeds I judge and much condemn,
Yet when did I make laws for them?
Please yourselves, say I, and they
Need only look the other way.
But no, they will not; they must still
Wrest their neighbour to their will,
And make me dance as they desire
With jail and gallows and hell-fire.
And how am I to face the odds
Of man’s bedevilment and God’s?
I, a stranger and afraid
In a world I never made.
They will be master, right or wrong;
Though both are foolish, both are strong,
And since, my soul, we cannot fly
To Saturn or Mercury,
Keep we must, if keep we can,
These foreign laws of God and man

A fascinating back story behind this poem.  I’ll try to be brief, you can google many more details.

Houseman, born 1859, was an English professor of classical Latin literature.  From a middle class family, he showed great academic promise and went to Oxford on a scholarship.   At Oxford, he fell in love with his best friend Mo.    Unfortunately for Houseman, when he finally confessed his love, Mo was straight and unable to reciprocate.  Mo left England and, for the most part, cut off contact with Houseman; nonetheless Houseman seems to have carried a torch for Mo his entire life.   In the meanwhile Houseman pursued his academic career, published papers, and became a professor of Latin.

In 1896, out of nowhere, Houseman published a book of poetry, A Shropshire Lad, and after a slow start the book became widely known.   But after this, Houseman continued to pursue his academic career – and stated that he was through writing poetry.

But in the 1920s, he got word that Mo was dying of cancer.  Houseman pulled together a second volume of poems for Mo.   The poem above is from this second volume.

After that, Houseman never published poetry again during his lifetime, and instead became known as the foremost Latin scholar of his generation.

Houseman died in 1936.   In 1997, the playwright Tom Stoppard wrote a play The Invention of Love about Houseman’s life & times.  Many consider this to be Stoppard’s finest work.

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I was unaware of any of these details when I recently put the above poem to music for an assignment in my composition class.  If you’re curious (and I know you are), you can hear at this link:

Laws of God

This performance is quite a departure for me to work with an opera singer.   To my rock & roll ears, opera singers sound a bit weird, but Katrina (the singer) really put her whole heart into the song.

You may also notice that I took a few liberties with the words – especially at the very end. . . .

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April 1, Saturday, 9:00 PM-1:00 AM – Dave Rudbarg and Friends,  at PJ Ryan’s Squared, 4 Path Plaza, Jersey City (201) 222-1600
Dave Rudbarg, vocalist extraordinaire, is a mainstay on the Metropolitan blues jam circuit.  We have crossed paths many times, but this is the first opportunity I’ve had to be a part of his act.   For this show, Dave has pulled together some monster players, including Dave Fields on guitar, Casual T (yes that’s his name) on drums, and Michael Muller on bass.   I will be huffing and puffing to keep up with these guys.   PJ Rayn’s Squared is right above the Journal Square Path station, so you New Yorkers have no excuse not to come on out and enjoy some fresh Jersey air..

April 14, Friday, 7:00-9:00 PM – With Arthur Neilson,  at Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza, 64 1/2 Chestnut Ave, Montclair  (973) 509-1134
Many a moon has passed since the last time I played at Ruthie’s, so I’m looking forward to doing this guitar-piano duo with the amazing Arthur Neilson.   In the absence of Arthur’s full “kick ass” band, Arthur & I will have to suffice with kicking only one butt cheek.
http://www.ruthiesbbq.com/
http://www.arthurneilson.com/

March 3, 2017:      A Gentleman of Leisure?

I have recently gone into semi-retirement mode.  What does that mean (I hear you say)?   It means that my schedule at my day job has been reduced to 24 hours a week.   On Tuesdays & Thursdays I live my life as usual – I catch the 6:06 AM train, go to karate, shower, go to the office and do my part to help sell my company’s software.  But the other three days a week?  I put in a few hours a day from home in the morning – and then?  I’m free, free, free!

So what do I do with all this new found copious free time?  
–  I compose
–  I practice piano
–  I think about all the different ways that Trump and company are going to wreck the economy and make my retirement funds worthless (yes, a pointless exercise)
–  I catch up on all the things around the house that I never have time to do.  
–  I clean up the deleted items folder in my e-mail.
–  I get dinner ready for Lisa when she gets home from work (usually this consists of boiling water for pasta or heating up a frozen pizza)
–  I look at my retirement funds again.  It’s been two whole hours, who knows what they might have done in those two hours.

I feel like I’m getting away with something.  

Maybe I’m entering the twilight years.  Or maybe it’s just the Twilight Zone.   Yeah, that’s it.  In this Twilight Zone episode, the retired man has worked hard all his life and imagines that he can finally relax and enjoy life.  But then it’s all some dream or something – and in fact he goes to work 7 days a week and lives on bread & water.  Or something equally bizarre.

Yeah, yeah, I know.  On the count of three, everyone cry a river for me.   Or play a very tiny violin.   Or come hear me play.

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March 4, Saturday, 9:00PM-1:00AM – Better Off Dead at The Great Notch Inn, Route 46, Little Falls  (973) 256-7742
It’s been a while since BoD has been unleashed on an unsuspecting audience – or a suspecting one for that matter.  But no matter what your level of suspectfulness happens to be, be prepared to suspect the unsuspected (or something to that effect)
http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/
http://www.agreatertown.com/little_falls_nj/great_notch_inn_new_jerseys_rockin_roadhouse_00089580

March 11th, Saturday, 8:00PM-10:30ish – Shuffle, Jump, and Moan at Hat City, 459 Valley Street,  City of Orange, NJ 07050 (862) 252-9147What with the crazy up & down weather we’ve been having, there’s no telling what it will be like outside, but inside it will be just right.  Great food here.  I believe there’s a cover charge of $10 – but you can call ahead to double check.  You can leave your hat on. 
http://www.hatcitykitchen.com https://www.facebook.com/pages/Shuffle-Jump-Moan/379081422265206?fref=ts

March 25th, Saturday, 9:00 PM-11:30ish – Better Off Dead at at Maxfields on Main, 713 Main Street, Boonton, New Jersey 07005  973-588-4450A fascinating back story behind the town of Boonton – it dates to pre-Revolutionary  War times.  Better of Dead does not go back quite as far, but if you ask nicely, I’m sure you can get the Better off Dead back story.  Maxfields on Main is a converted fire house from the 1890s, the food is excellent and the ambience is top notch.
http://www.maxfieldsonmain.com/http://www.betteroffdead.com/home.htm/

January 18, 2017:      Kill the Squirrels

Kill the Squirrels

Yes!   Death to these squirrelly rodents.    You…  you…. you…  squirrels, you.

What, you ask, has brought on these murderous thoughts?   Well it’s. . . .    HEY YOU!  SQUIRREL!  STOP CRAPPING ALL OVER MY DECK!   AND GET OFF MY LAWN!    Sorry, I just got distracted there.  Where was I?  Oh yes.  Kill the squirrels.

The problem stems from the fact that we live in a squirrel theme park here in suburban Montclair.   We have plenty of trees, squirrel food, and water – and there are no predators.  Every once in a while a red tailed hawk comes through and snatches one, but that’s a rare event.

Now if only these pesky, nut eating midgets would just stop depositing their nasty rodent droppings on our deck and stop leaving half eaten acorns strewn across the deck and backyard, I guess I could declare a truce.  But there’s no reasoning with them. 

Am I over-reacting?    I think not.   In 1918, the good citizens of the great state of California had the right idea.  They declared a war on squirrels, and in the front line of this war they drafted children.   Yes, you heard me correctly.   California declared a children’s crusade against squirrels.

A most excellent idea, I think.   I’ve included the original war poster at the bottom.   You can check out the full details here: http://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/in-1918-california-drafted-children-into-a-war-on-squirrels

And while we’re at it?   Go ahead and Kill Da Wabbit.    http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1atzuy_what-s-opera-doc_shortfilms.

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Jan 20th, Friday, 8:00PM-10:30ish – Shuffle, Jump, and Moan at Hat City, 459 Valley Street,  City of Orange, NJ 07050 (862) 252-9147
The first show of the new year for Shuffle, Jump, and Moan.  They’re calling for rain this Friday, but it will be dry and warm inside.  I believe there’s a cover charge of $10 – but you can call ahead to double check.  You can leave your hat on. 
http://www.hatcitykitchen.com
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Shuffle-Jump-Moan/379081422265206?fref=ts

Feb 4th, Saturday, 7:30PM-9:30 – New Music for Voices and Strings, National Opera Center, 330 7th Ave, New York, NY 10001
This is the second concert of the season for the Composer’s Collective – an organization dedicated to helping composers of new classical music.  This concert will include the first public performance of a string quartet I’ve been working on (well, the first movement) – along with a bunch of other strange and interesting pieces for either string quartet or choral group.  Tickets are $10 each.  Besides the actual performances, you get to mingle with the composers and players after the show and munch on cheese & crackers and sip wine.   The venue is in midtown Manhattan – only a few blocks from Penn Station – but is on the small side, so if you are thinking of going I recommend you order tickets ahead of time using the link just below.   Tickets are available at the door as well.
http://www.composerscollective.org/event/winter-concert/
http://www.composerscollective.org

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 And as promised here’s the official “Kill The Squirrels” poster.  Notice the “Hotel California” reference?